The 3 S’s of Re-Building Community

The 3 S’s of Re-Building Community

Welcome to the next normal in which people are more disconnected and more polarized than in previous generations. And more lonely. Yet the need for belonging is at an all-time high. That’s why I have been exploring what I call the 3 S’s of Re-Building Community: being social, being spiritual, and being of service.

 

The Problem of Institution

You may have heard that the church as an institution is over. After all, the nones and dones are increasing while the number of religiously affiliated are decreasing. Generally, giving, worship attendance, and missional engagement have dipped post pandemic. Pundits tell us that the church as we know it is over. Maybe. Maybe not.

 

The Myth You Don’t Have What it Takes

You may believe there is nothing you can do to attract and serve people. But, don’t believe the myth that the church doesn’t have what it takes to reach people. Nothing could be further from the truth.

 

I Have Seen Vitality Surge

For the last 13 years I have been empowering church leaders to create cultures of renewal. In their ministry settings, I have seen leaders create supportive and social spiritual communities. These communities are combating the loneliness pandemic. Happiness is expanding and stronger social bonds are being built. I have also seen vitality surge when churches move from talking about God to incorporating direct experiences with the divine.

Finally, we see giving, worship attendance, and missional engagement all go up when you engage with your community. It creates a culture of renewal.

 

Why the 3 S’s of Re-Building Community

It’s Biblical:

Our call to build community is woven into the very fabric of our faith. The Great Commandment calls us to love God with all our being and to love our neighbors as ourselves. This love, by its nature, compels us to connect with others, and to support one another.

Additionally, the Great Commission instructs us to “go and make disciples… teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you.” Building communities allows us to fulfill this commission more effectively, offering a space for learning, growth, and spiritual guidance.

 

It’s Cultural:

This model of rebuilding community resonates deeply with today’s culture, especially millennials. Millennials sometimes get labeled as disinterested in traditional institutions like the church. The reality is more nuanced. They may not seek out spirituality in the same way as previous generations, yet millennials crave meaningful connections, personal growth, and a sense of purpose. Millennials are also passionate about making a positive impact on the world. They also often face social isolation despite being actively connected online.

Invite millennials into your spiritual community to build genuine in-person relationships with like-minded individuals. This counteracts the loneliness and isolation commonly reported by this generation.

 

It’s Workable:

Alcoholics Anonymous has been incredibly successful in building strong communities of support for its members using the 3 S’s of Re-Building Community. Churches can learn a lot from AA about how to build communities that are welcoming, supportive, and life-changing.

 

  1. Shared social time: AA groups provide opportunities for members to socialize and build relationships outside of structured meetings. This could involve attending picnics, going bowling, or simply grabbing coffee after a meeting.
  2. Deep focus on a spiritual path: While AA is not affiliated with any particular religion, it does emphasize the importance of a spiritual path. This shared focus on spirituality provides a sense of purpose and direction for members.
  3. Helping newcomers and serving the community: AA places a strong emphasis on helping newcomers and giving back to the community. Newcomers are warmly welcomed and sponsored by experienced members who provide guidance and support. This focus on service to others fosters a sense of shared responsibility and strengthens the sense of belonging.

 

Next Steps

This simplified approach to rebuilding community is easy to implement. Find the ways you are already being social, being spiritual, and being of service. And imbue them with extra intentionality.

The more you increase engagement in the 3 S’s of Re-Building Community, the stronger your community will be. But there is more to leadership than doing. These times call for Conscious Leadership. Come to Elevate Your Ministry: An Introduction to Conscious Leadership to learn about the importance of mastering your mindset, awakening your spirituality, and becoming an intentional visionary.

If you want input on your ministry, click here for a free one-on-one 45-minute Discovery Session with me.

 

Copyright © 2024 rebekahsimonpeter.com.  All Rights Reserved.

Why Churches Must Build Spiritual Community

Why Churches Must Build Spiritual Community

We all need to feel like we belong, right? It’s essential for our mental health, happiness, and productivity, especially as we navigate life after a global pandemic, church disaffiliations, and membership decline. One of the most critical ways churches can help their communities is by building a strong sense of spiritual community.

 

Belonging Matters

Being part of a community is more than having friends or sharing similar interests. It’s about actively participating in big and small groups that shape who you are. Whether singing with the choir at church, organizing a family reunion, or planning a work event, each group you belong to affirms your sense of belonging and boosts your self-esteem.

Harvard researchers found that close relationships are key to keeping people happy and healthy throughout their lives. Social connections with family, friends, and community can delay mental and physical decline. Meanwhile, neuroscientists at MIT have discovered that the same part of the brain registers cravings for human interaction and food. At the same time, the pain of being excluded and physical pain are also located in the same area. This suggests that belonging is just as essential as our favorite foods.

 

What Happens when Churches Build Spiritual Community?

Pastor Sharon Cochran, a participant in the Creating a Culture of Renewal® community, knows how hard it can be to build spiritual community. Worship attendance decreased by around 50% over the pandemic. The church felt empty and sluggish. It felt like she had to do everything.

Then, Pastor Sharon began to incorporate principles of building spiritual community.

She started a newsletter, with a lot of information about activities, and gave people reasons to return to church. She also began a new evening Bible Study.

She invited others into leadership of worship, and let them know their voices were valued.

Worship used to be solely pastor-led. Now the laity, especially the youth, have actively jumped in to lead. Worship has more active engagement; in fact where people were reluctant to share their voices, prayer time has expanded in length and diversity.  It’s not uncommon to participate in the laying on of hands, or praying aloud with each other. Now worship attendance is back up 30%!

These things in and of themselves, are excellent.

But when you build spiritual community, engagement goes up in a number of ways.

In Pastor Sharon’s church, five new people have joined the Missions team. They are so engaged, that they have decided to meet more often. Their engagement is up 300%. There has been a 100-% increase in volunteers at the Client Choice Food Pantry. Even committees have seen a 5% uptick in participation as new people have gotten involved in being of service.

All this missional engagement has led to a financial turnaround. For the first time in a long time, giving is now outpacing expenses.

This church is alive, active, engaged!

And it all started with building spiritual community. In other words, Pastor Sharon created spaces that promote conversation and connection, heard people’s needs, and invited them all into a new way of being in community. Building a sense of community is vital.

 

The Principles of Building Spiritual Community

1) Include Time for Talking

I arrived early for worship one morning and headed straight for the front chancel area since it was my turn to serve as liturgist. I was invited to join the small choir leading the singing as soon as I arrived. While preparing for worship, Linda, Dana, Susan, and I chatted about Linda’s recent doctor’s appointment, Susan’s preparation for the children’s sermon, and Dana’s impeccable sense of timing. I’m not super close to these folks, but this kind of informal talk pulled us together as worship leaders and prepared us to enter into the spirit of worship by giving us a sense of belonging. Being social, even as informal as this was, can bean intentional part of what it means to be spiritual. For instance, I noticed that as worship unfolded very few people moved or had speaking parts in the service. Along with the preacher and the musician, the small choir and I were responsible for all the service’s active parts. There wasn’t even an official time to say hello to each other.

This dynamic could be changed by asking people to exchange a few words with someone sitting nearby—like introducing themselves, sharing something they are grateful for, noting where God was present the previous week or exchanging a prayer concern. Those online could post something in the chat to share with others participating virtually. Even small social interchanges can create a greater sense of community.

 

2) Include Food

Weaving the social and spiritual together can take place at a programmatic level by gathering folks around common interests and needs. Take cooking and eating, for example. Consider the meal Abram and Sarai made for the angelic visitors at the oaks of Mamre. Or the many times Jesus ate with others as occasions for fellowship and teaching. Resurrect the practice of building a social and spiritual community around food by intentionally hosting classes or experiences that encompass these themes. For instance, teaching people how to garden or cook could offer a store-to-plate or farm-to-table experience. As you first shop or garden, prepare, cook, and enjoy the food, you can interweave biblical themes like hospitality or care of the body into your discussions. Then invite the Risen Christ to join you at the table. Not only will community form around these experiences, but these experiences can lead to community-oriented projects or congregation-community partnerships.

 

3) Get Hands-On

People love to know they are making a difference in the world, that their actions are meaningful. Consider hosting missional activities allowing individuals to experience this connection directly, such as community workdays or projects like Habitat for Humanity or packing meals for the hungry. Think of creative ways to involve the children and young people. These experiences enable people to creatively collaborate in service of something larger than themselves and create a sense of community as they work towards a common goal.

Joining hands in service as a community can lead to incredible results. Just look at Sharon’s church, which experienced a surge in worship attendance by implementing this principle. By calling for unity and collective action (spiritual community in action), they saw a remarkable rise in volunteerism: a 100% uptick in volunteers at a local food pantry, a 150% increase in the ministry of Backpacks 4 Kids volunteers, and a staggering 600% increase in unchurched individuals seeking pastoral care. This is the power of mission meeting community: it transforms lives and creates a better world.

 

By designing gatherings that include the social, missional, and spiritual, you promote spiritual and emotional growth while building community between and among members. The bonus of creating a spiritual community is bolstering mental health. When you belong to groups, include time to talk, and share a meal, you help create a more robust church – one that is both social and spiritual. It’s not hard to do, and it may seem too simple to be true, but it makes a world of difference.

As we navigate the challenges of declining church attendance and the aftermath of a global pandemic, creating a sense of spiritual community is more important than ever. I’m excited to invite you to my upcoming workshop, “How Christian Ministries are Achieving Success: An Introduction to Creating a Culture of Renewal®,” where you’ll learn how to build a more vital, more vibrant ministry that serves your community and glorifies God.  Or reach out for a one-on-one conversation. We’d love to hear hear from you.

 

Adapted from “Forging a New Path: Moving the Church Forward in a Post-Pandemic World” (Market Square Publishers, 2022).

 

Copyright © 2023 rebekahsimonpeter.com.  All Rights Reserved.

The 3 S’s of Creating Community

The 3 S’s of Creating Community

One of the primary responsibilities of church leaders is to create a sense of community among the people in our congregations, on our teams, and in our organization. Likely you won’t find this on any job description, but it is one of the most important functions a pastor plays. It is even more critical in a post-pandemic world. In this article, I will share with you the 3 S’s of Creating Community: being spiritual, being social, and being of service.

 

Congregations are not Necessarily Communities

First, a warning. Congregations are not necessarily communities. Just because a group of people gathers to worship God together does not mean they feel like a community or think of themselves as a community. As the leader, be aware that creating community requires more than gathering and keeping people together. The deepest sense of community comes when people feel connected to each other on more than one level. After all, the church is the web of relationships formed through Jesus’s teaching and ministry. And the only way to do that is through the three S’s. Let’s break down how being spiritual, being social, and being of service promotes connection within our congregations and builds the sense of community.

 

Being Spiritual

The first part of building a sense of community in a congregation is promoting spiritual growth. Spirituality is the deep, unique, and personal relationship between a person and their God. As a person awakens spiritually, they come to understand that they are more than physical beings, they are spiritual beings as well. Just as we must eat to nurture our physical beings, so we must cultivate an intimate relationship with God to nurture our souls. While worship, prayer meetings, Bible study, mission trips, and other activities of a congregation can open a person to spiritual growth, they don’t ensure it. Being spiritual is not a passive activity. It requires honesty and vulnerability with God and oneself. And a willingness to explore one’s inner divinity.

As leaders, we must focus on providing our congregations with opportunities to experience spiritual growth and connection. Cultivating deeper spirituality in your congregation doesn’t mean you, as a leader, need to go and create a bunch of new programs. But it does require moving the focus of what you are already doing to emphasize the spiritual. The simple practice of naming the intent in your gatherings will be enough to help people focus on the presence of the divine. Of course, the more attention you pay to your own spirituality, the easier it will be to create conditions conducive to spiritual growth among your people.

 

Being Social

Cultivating social connections between people is crucial when creating community. Events and gatherings that encourage fun is helpful. This isn’t just for youth groups, either! Fun and laughter among adults open the space for greater trust, and more meaningful conversation.

This can range from casual gatherings, like potlucks or game nights, to formal outings, like retreats or mission trips.

These social gatherings don’t have to be overtly spiritual. Sometimes connection comes from proximity; being physically close together can build trust and deepen relationships. As we look at the gospels, we get a snapshot of Jesus’ interaction with the crowds, religious leaders, and disciples. However, if Jesus’ public ministry lasted for three years, then certainly he spent a lot more time with the disciples than what is recorded. I am sure Jesus spent time socializing with them, sharing meals and laughter, getting to know their stories, and vice versa. Moments of levity often catalyze meaningful relationship growth.

No matter what type of event you plan, fostering an open environment where everyone feels comfortable talking with each other will help build relationships long after the event ends.

As I write in Forging a New Path, I used to think that churches being social wasn’t a high value; that it weakened their primary  identity as followers and ambassadors of Christ. I have changed my mind on that. Without social bonds, people don’t feel like they belong. If they don’t feel like they belong, it’s hard for people to feel the love of God, or to effectively be of service together.

 

Being Of Service

Finally, being of service is essential for creating lasting relationships within any community. The service offered doesn’t have to be huge. It could be as simple as encouraging people to look out for one another, and then giving them opportunities to do it. Lending support when needed will go a long way toward fostering an atmosphere of love and acceptance within your community.

While being of service doesn’t have to be huge to be effective, it is helpful for people to focus on others. All the feel good hormones increase when people undertake acts of service and generosity. Reach inside your community, and outside your community as well.

Think about ways your church or organization can give back. Could you sponsor a Habitat for Humanity house, make a local home more accessible for someone with a disability, or bake cookies for teachers returning to school? These examples are tangible ways to serve and build trust within a community.

The three S’s—being spiritual, being social, and being of service—are essential elements for deepening congregations into communities. Especially in the post-pandemic age.

By creating an atmosphere where everyone feels comfortable connecting spiritually with God and one another while engaging in meaningful relationships through social activities and acts of service, we can make vibrant communities built on love and understanding rather than judgment or competition.

If you want to learn more about how to create a vibrant faith community amid the challenges of church culture, check out my latest book Forging a New Path. In it, I give practical wisdom on how to build the church into a transformational and inclusive community.  To further your learning and help put congregational and community renewal into practice, consider my three year group leadership program, Creating a Culture of Renewal®.

No matter what you do, remember that long-lasting relationships come from creating a safe space where everyone can feel comfortable expressing themselves and connecting with others. So keep the three S’s in mind as you work towards building a thriving faith community!

 

Copyright © 2023 rebekahsimonpeter.com. All Rights Reserved.

Clear Skies, Clear Minds

Clear Skies, Clear Minds

If you’ve spent much time in the Rockies, you know that this time of year is truly the golden hour. Long, hot days followed by warm, starry nights. The rich, yet fleeting summers in Wyoming are wonderfully delicious, but woefully ephemeral. With so much to do and so little time, the summer months usually fly by before I even realize they’re fading. It’s easy to get so wrapped up in work and responsibility that we forget to make time to take advantage of these short-lived luxuries. To get outside and let clear skies clear our minds.

 

Sunrise Spirituality

This summer, I made a commitment to begin each day with a morning hike on the mountain or walk along the river in my small community of Casper, Wyoming. Always accompanied by my dog, Beau, and often by my husband, Jerry, this morning ritual has become a time of true spirituality for me.

But this wasn’t my intention when I made my initial commitment to take these daily walks. It was more about staying healthy, getting my steps in, and getting Beau some exercise. At first, I had to drag myself out the door, often convincing myself just to lace up my shoes before I was awake enough to give myself a chance to change my mind to squeeze in an hour of email instead.  

As the days progressed and my new habit set in, I began to relish this time. It became less about the routine, and more about embracing the opportunity to cultivate a deeper spiritual relationship with God.

 

Building Spiritual Habits

Whether it be the gratitude ping-pong Jerry and I play as we walk, the time I’m able to spend talking with my aging parents, or quiet time taking in the natural beauty I’m surrounded by, I’ve not yet had a morning outing where I didn’t feel an immediate deeper connection with God.

Often this connection feels more profound than what I’ve recently experienced during Sundays in church, where we’d expect to find it. There is something about taking time to mindfully meditate and allow ourselves to just BE.

 

Cultivate Your Spirituality

Are you ready to cultive your spiritual connection through nature? Here are three things to kep in mind.

  1. Start small

You don’t have to climb a mountain or trek a certain distance to benefit from being outside, or disconnecting from indoor routines. I’ve found that sometimes walking without a destination in mind helps me be ok with not always having a plan.

  1. Be present

Focus on being in the moment. Your mind might tend toward rehashing old frustrations or worrying about the work you need to do. Just notice what your mind is doing and bring your attention back to where your feet are. Take in your surroundings, your feelings, and cut yourself some slack.

  1. Make time

It will always feel like there aren’t enough hours in the day. There is always more work to be completed, more emails to be sent, and more planning to be done.  I believe that allowing yourself these moments, though, will be undeniably worth it.

As I look back over the years, I realize that slipping back into too much roof and not enough sky is a common refrain for me. I wonder how I get out of the habit of granting myself these uninterrupted moments. I suppose that it can feel somewhat selfish, taking time away from my desk or my computer. But this summer, I’ve found that these “selfish” moments are where the real work gets done. Where I am able to open myself to the opportunity to talk directly with God, embrace my spirituality, and reflect on what I want out of each day. I give thanks for this time of renewal. In Creating a Culture of Renewal®, we emphasize that renewal begins within. Don’t I know it!  I hope you’ll give yourself the gift of renewal by taking unhurried time with God in nature.

 

Copyright © 2022 rebekahsimonpeter.com, All Rights Reserved.

How to Build Spiritual Community

How to Build Spiritual Community

Belonging is a key aspect of mental health, happiness, and productivity. This is especially true in a post-pandemic world. It’s why creating true community at church—community that is both social and spiritual—is essential. In this article, I’ll share three ways to build spiritual community.

 

Belong to Groups

One crucial element of community is having friends or being with like-minded people, but there’s more to belonging than that. Participating in groups is also important. The real power of belonging is revealed when you are part of multiple groups: for instance, belonging to church, plus singing with the choir; or belonging to your family, plus being on the team that organizes the summer reunion; or belonging at work, plus being part of the group that plans the Christmas party. Or all of the above. The more groups you belong to—no matter how big or small—the more your self-esteem rises because it affirms that you belong. You’re part of the community.

An enduring Harvard study revealed that “close relationships are what keep people happy throughout their lives, and these relationships with family, friends, and community delay mental and physical decline.” I assert that vibrant connections of belonging—to one another, to God, to the community at large—can delay organizational decline as well.

A recent study conducted by neuroscientists at MIT, the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, found that cravings for human interactions and food register in the same part of the brain. Likewise, the pain of being excluded by others and physical pain are also located in the same part of the brain. In other words, belonging is as delicious as your favorite food. Not belonging throbs like a broken bone.

 

Include Time for Talking

I arrived early for worship one morning and headed straight for the front chancel area since it was my turn to serve as liturgist. As soon as I arrived, I was invited to join the small choir that would be leading the singing. It was easy to say yes because I wouldn’t have to worry about hitting every note; the pipe organ would be the dominant sound in the sanctuary. In between preparing the scripture reading, glancing at the call to worship, and scoping out the hymns on the order of worship, Linda, Dana, Susan, and I chatted about Linda’s recent doctor’s appointment, Susan’s preparation for the children’s sermon, and Dana’s impeccable sense of timing. I’m not super close to these folks, but this kind of informal talk pulled us together as worship leaders and prepared us to enter into the spirit of worship by giving us a sense of belonging. I could feel the sense of connection deep in my bones.

At one level, being social is as simple as our informal visiting before worship. On another level, being social can be an even more intentional part of what it means to be spiritual. For instance, I noticed that as worship unfolded—since there was no passing of the peace or passing of offering plates—very few people moved or had speaking parts in the service. Along with the preacher and the musician, the small choir and I were responsible for all the service’s active parts. That meant everyone else in worship was fairly passive. There wasn’t even an official time to say hello to each other.

This dynamic could be changed by asking people to exchange a few words with a person sitting nearby—like introducing yourself, sharing something you are grateful for, noting where God was present in the previous week, or exchanging a prayer concern. Those online could post something in the chat to share with others participating virtually. Even small social interchanges such as these can amplify a sense of belonging and create a greater sense of community.

 

Include Food

Weaving the social and spiritual together can take place at a programmatic level as well by gathering folks together around common interests and needs. For example, find themes or activities that are biblical and contemporary with both social and spiritual aspects. Take cooking and eating, for example. Consider the meal Abram and Sarai made for the angelic visitors at the oaks of Mamre. Or the many times Jesus ate with others as occasions for fellowship and teaching. Or the post-resurrection meal Jesus shared with a handful of his disciples. In each instance, eating was both social and spiritual. Who doesn’t know the transcendent experience of being nourished by just the right food at just the right time? Food is more than calories or nutrition. It provides the bridge for conversation and sustenance for the soul.

Resurrect the practice of building social and spiritual community around food by intentionally hosting classes or experiences that encompass these themes. For instance, in teaching people how to garden or cook, you could offer a store-to-plate or farm-to-table experience. As you first shop or garden, prepare, cook, and enjoy the food, you can interweave biblical themes like hospitality or care of the body into your discussions. Or, more simply, share a scripture or two. Then invite the Risen Christ to join you at the table. Not only will community form around these experiences, but these experiences themselves can lead to community-oriented projects or congregation-community partnerships.

 

Get Hands On

When weaving together the social and the spiritual, the same sort of multi-faceted experience can apply to crafts and creativity, construction and building, parenting, and mentoring children or young adults.

By designing gatherings that include both the social and spiritual, you promote spiritual and emotional growth while building community between and among members. The bonus in creating spiritual community is that you bolster mental health as well. When you belong to groups, include time to talk, and include food, you help create a stronger church – one that is both social and spiritual. It’s not hard to do, and it may seem too simple to be true, but it makes a world of difference.

Adapted from Rebekah Simon-Peter’s upcoming book, Forging a New Path: Moving the Church Forward in a Post-Pandemic World (Market Square Publishers, 2022)

 

Copyright © 2022 rebekahsimonpeter.com, All Rights Reserved.